As I do after many riding lessons, today I sat down to really think about what I was being taught or reminded of. The word that came up is TRUST. Tom is a very trustworthy behaviorally, so it is not that kind of trust that I am referring to.

My horse, Tom, and I are currently at a trainer's barn working on softness. As an ex-racehorse it would seem that this would be difficult for Tom. The truth is, however, that he can be soft very easily. But he will do so only when the rider consistently gives a release for being there, and that is where trust comes in. I have a tendency to hang on to his mouth, in hopes of keeping him right where I want him. And where I want him is where I think my trainer wants him (which is another story about trust.) If I could allow myself to trust that Tom will comply with my requests, simply because I have requested him to do so, there would be no need to force him to stay where I want him. This lack of trust in Tom, translates to other areas of my life as well. Fear (perhaps not the right word) of stating what I truly want has haunted me for as long as I can remember. I would rather not ask, then be disappointed in not receiving. And yet, because I was in a lesson today, I did ask for what I wanted, but out of a lack of trust was not able to step out of the way to receive the answer. Which then causes me to hold on to his mouth, which in turn creates a hardness instead of the softness we're both searching for.

Trust is an odd thing to acquire, because you have to earn it even with yourself. Yet, you also have to have it before you can actually know it. And in my opinion at this time, it's one of the things some of us our here on earth to learn. Have you found trust in your horse? Are you willing to step back after you ask for what you want, allowing it to come your way rather than forcing it. Our horses can be our teachers in so many ways, are you willing to be a student?